Seal bursters...Eeew! Thanks Julia! Now I can't get the image of a xenomorph/seal hybrid out of my mind!

Seal bursters...Eeew! Thanks Julia! Now I can't get the image of a xenomorph/seal hybrid out of my mind!

... good luck sleeping tonight.

Arkham sleeps, and Terror creeps...

Probably still better than sleeping at hotel in Innsmouth...

Yes, the Gillman House is the worst hotel I've ever staid at! Rundown, smelly, dirty! No bolts on my chamber door and I couldn't sleep because the locals kept rampaging trough the place! Rating: One star!

I'm surprised you lived long enough to be able to post your review. Plus, I think you're being generous. Maybe if the fish people stopped trying to murder me in the middle of my sleep, they could *improve* their rating to one star.

I've just found out the good people of the Gillman House are relatives of mine. Turns out my great grandfather married an Insmouth woman. Nice place Insmouth. Friendly faces everywhere, people shouting "Ia Cthulhu!"

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to bust my cousin out of the insane asylum.

Yes, the Gillman House is the worst hotel I've ever staid at! Rundown, smelly, dirty! No bolts on my chamber door and I couldn't sleep because the locals kept rampaging trough the place! Rating: One star!

Put the review on TripAdvisor...

Yes, the Gillman House is the worst hotel I've ever staid at! Rundown, smelly, dirty! No bolts on my chamber door and I couldn't sleep because the locals kept rampaging trough the place! Rating: One star!

Put the review on TripAdvisor...

...I'd advise that you don't go there on your trip.

My band - Arkham's Razor

Lol, love it.......

My band - Arkham's Razor

Lol, love it.......

I imagine the band being like Alan Parson's Project. That would be awesome.

Four pages of awful jokes and puns and it's still going. Despair at what you have achieved. :/

Ooooh Arkham

Ain't no place for a sane boy like me

Ooooh Arkham

Ain't no place for a sane boy like me

Every time I hit that cursed city

you know it's gonna make a wreck out of me

First time I loose ( sanity ) I drink whiskey

Second time I loose ( sanity ) I drink gin

Third time I loose ( sanity ) I drink anything

Because I think I'm gonna win.

Oooh Arkham

Ain't no place for a sane boy like me

Oooh Arkham

Ain't no place for a sane boy like me

Everytime i hit that cursed city

You know it's gonna make a wreck out of me

Spent all night with a demon

trying to get ahead

spent all day at the asylum

trying to get out of bed

Gram Parsons - Ooh Las Vegas Ooh Arkham

My band - Arkham's Razor

Lol, love it.......

I imagine the band being like Alan Parson's Project. That would be awesome.

Arkham Razor's Project, I'd say, for consistency.

Anyhoo, as for the original Alan Parson's... they were totally Mythos-oriented. If we check the lyrics for Old and Wise, we notice a clear reference to the King in Yellow performance ( As the final curtain falls before my eyes )

Clearly Julia, and lets not forget the song lyric "You're in need of Dr. West and Professor Walters"

Totally exists.

Four pages of awful jokes and puns and it's still going. Despair at what you have achieved. :/

This thread is a manifestation of our darkest desires, the things of which we dare not speak unless using a proxy server! Moar puns! Moahahaha!!

So, anyway, is there something fishy going on in Innsmouth or what? Thank you! Thank you! I'll be back same time next week!

SECURITY!!

Professor: " In the ashes of the cultist lodge we found some silver flutes and cryptic notes pertaining to the summoning of Cthuga and his fire vampires."

Investigator: " You could say" *puts on sunglasses* " they were playing with fire."

YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

SECURITY!!

Rofl

Seriously though... *sidesteppes guardhound of Tindalos* ... what's the deal with Deep Ones when they venture outside of Innsmouth? They go shopping in Arkham and store owners go "she tried every single dress and now they are all covered in slime"! I don't mean to be rude but don't they know they should try the non-euclidian department? Then again, the poor shop owner there was probably afraid to remind his customer that they don't stock size Cyclopean! I told my mother once, and she nearly made a human sacrifice out of me! *Drummer hits a few, ending with the crash*

*Pats doggie of Tindalos on head* And what's the thing about speaking through your gills? None of what you say is going to make any sense! It's all Plg'lugn hwahghi shoggoth'hu gnu'ingldyah, hfir'ln plg'luinh ph'thahnl. Of course, not being so good at other languages myself, I once tried to explain that I couldn't understand what the gentleman was saying. Of course, he didn't really understand me either so there I was, saying the same thing again, only slightly louder and with a ludicrous accent to really make the message come home: "Me no speak-o Dagon!" *Drummer reprise*

Of course, I feel a bit bad about the whole thing. Pure ignorance on my part! It's not like I was trying to make him lose his temper, but if I had, boy did he take the bait hook, line and sinker! *Quick roll, pause, crash!*

Turns out the gentleman sliming me was a businessman. He mistook me for his future trading partner (we all look the same to them!) and had just been asking me about my net worth! *Strained drum-tish!*

Afterwards, the dry-cleaner told me "Boy you smell of fish!" so I says "Then you should see the other guy!" *Exasperated drummer wants to go home*

I got one more for you folks! It's multilayered so go home and sleep on it: you'll wake up giggling, promise! This guy in the museum comes up to me and asks "So, the Necronomicon, whaddaya think about it?" so I says "Deepends." *drummer chews through his stick* Get it? Get it? Got it? No? OhItried.

Seriously though... *sidesteppes guardhound of Tindalos* ... what's the deal with Deep Ones when they venture outside of Innsmouth? They go shopping in Arkham and store owners go "she tried every single dress and now they are all covered in slime"! I don't mean to be rude but don't they know they should try the non-euclidian department? Then again, the poor shop owner there was probably afraid to remind his customer that they don't stock size Cyclopean! I told my mother once, and she nearly made a human sacrifice out of me! *Drummer hits a few, ending with the crash*

*Pats doggie of Tindalos on head* And what's the thing about speaking through your gills? None of what you say is going to make any sense! It's all Plg'lugn hwahghi shoggoth'hu gnu'ingldyah, hfir'ln plg'luinh ph'thahnl. Of course, not being so good at other languages myself, I once tried to explain that I couldn't understand what the gentleman was saying. Of course, he didn't really understand me either so there I was, saying the same thing again, only slightly louder and with a ludicrous accent to really make the message come home: "Me no speak-o Dagon!" *Drummer reprise*

Of course, I feel a bit bad about the whole thing. Pure ignorance on my part! It's not like I was trying to make him lose his temper, but if I had, boy did he take the bait hook, line and sinker! *Quick roll, pause, crash!*

Turns out the gentleman sliming me was a businessman. He mistook me for his future trading partner (we all look the same to them!) and had just been asking me about my net worth! *Strained drum-tish!*

Afterwards, the dry-cleaner told me "Boy you smell of fish!" so I says "Then you should see the other guy!" *Exasperated drummer wants to go home*

I got one more for you folks! It's multilayered so go home and sleep on it: you'll wake up giggling, promise! This guy in the museum comes up to me and asks "So, the Necronomicon, whaddaya think about it?" so I says "Deepends." *drummer chews through his stick* Get it? Get it? Got it? No? OhItried.

*slow clap*

WHERE THE HELL IS SECURITY?????

*stuffs donut in mouth* yeah I'm on it.

*facepalm*

*Shows up clean shaven wearing a brand new guard uniform*

Good morning sir! I'll be working the day shift. Comedian by night, guard by day and all that!

*Glances towards the guard room*

Are there... any donuts left?

*stuffs last donut in mouth slowly*

sorry. no donuts.