The All Guardsmen Party

By ShoggySeldom, in Only War

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Hi folks, I'm popping in here on my holidays to share a story about bravery, incompetence, and detpacks.
This is, at heart, a campaign write-up, but it has grown over the months into something a little bigger than anyone expected. I'm hoping you guys enjoy it as much as the folks on reddit and tg.
This has become a rather long story and due to this forum's image limits (and my inability to find the spoiler tags) I'm going to have to link off-site. The entire story is split into screencapped chapters hosted on imgur below (with the original thread links too, if you'd prefer), but it can also all be found in a nice, clean, slightly more polished, google-hosted html file here:
The Adventures of the All Guardsmen Party
Prologue: Natural Selection Based Character Creation
Part 2: Guardsmen and Pilgrims
Part 3: Dude Where's My Psyker?
Part 4: What's in the Box?
Part 5: Nubby's Girlfriend
Part 6: Heretic Purging
Part 7: Discount Spaceship
Part 8: Good Soldiers, Bad Educators
Part 9: The Interplanetary Man of Mystery
Part 10: The Greater Good
Part 15.1: The "Stealth" Mission
Original Thread Link:
I'm rather new on the forum, so if I should move this somewhere else please tell me. Otherwise I'm happy to talk or answer questions and would love to hear any literary criticism.
Edited by ShoggySeldom
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I'm about a quarter of the way through the whole story. This is a fantastic read and it's given me a lot of great ideas. Thanks for writing it all down and posting it.

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I like the "So no **** (starts with sh, ends with it), there we were" reference.

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This story has made my day at work. Days between Christmas and New Year's eve are quite silent to work at Reception so nobody minds if I occasionally giggle to myself. :D

Just reading "Discount Spaceship" and things are just going down the drain.

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Glad you guys are enjoying the stories, I'll be sure to pop the next chapter up here.

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I gotta say, this is some of the best reading I have done when it comes to narrating 40k RPG's! Definitely made the time pass on swing shift at work a hell of a lot faster lol. It especially helped when I had some of my fellow teammates read your stories. I'm starting a new campaign soon in the 'Only War' setting and a lot of them don't know much about the 40k universe. They asked how to perform as guardsman...funny part is most of us are military ourselves but do to the nature of our jobs we can't really associate with the guardsman lifestyle. After reading a few of your stories they all agreed you did a great job narrating and it gave them a lot better understanding. Bravo mate! Much appreciated!

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Yay, story time.

For some reason I can not read the Ruberts part in other voice than Sir Hammerlock from Boderlands 2.

EDIT: Just finished reading the last part and my oh my, did I get good laugh. Had to check original thread link to see did I miss something in the end.

Edited by Routa-maa
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You got the voice about right, it's the dandy british officer cliche played to a T.

I may have to poke at the ending now that I'm not in last minute panic mode, I keep rushing the final posts and I think the clarity suffers.

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I have to make my players read these sometime.

These give so much how you can play your IG guy just trying to survive the s***t your superiors throw at you.

Might bring some common sense to my players when I lead my OW game.

They sometimes forget that their characters are squishy <_<

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"Yay, Story Time."

Routa-maa, I'm glad I'm not the only one who says that.

In any case.

Yay, story tiiime!!!

This is easily the best thing I've read in a good long time.

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Shoggyseldom:

I've been reading your stories for the last couple of days. Gotta say: Two thumbs up! I'm easily enjoying yours and Marwynn's stories at least as much as anything from Black Library. Soldier on sir!

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When's the next one coming out mate?

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Soon™

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Awesome! I can't wait!

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I managed to catch the latest story live when it was told and it was just as good as the previous ones.

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Here's the latest chapter:
Part 10: The Greater Good

I managed to catch the latest story live when it was told and it was just as good as the previous ones.

You know I actually spend a fair bit of time worrying about whether the quality is remaining consistent, thanks.

Edited by ShoggySeldom
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It definitely is. Besides, General Weebu and the sock puppets of lore were priceless.

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Just stumbled onto this, wish I had read it before some friends and I played OW a few months ago.

Wow.

Excellent work, I look forward to reading through more of the story.

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New chapter is up and it's a stupidly long one this time.
Worlds are searched, tech priests cause problems, we thoroughly annoy someone, and we get involved is a battle that's far too big for our comfort.

Part 11: The Xenotech Heresy

Original Thread Links:

Just stumbled onto this, wish I had read it before some friends and I played OW a few months ago.

Wow.

Excellent work, I look forward to reading through more of the story.

Thanks, glad you enjoy the stories.

Edited by ShoggySeldom
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Is anyone here interested in reading more chapters of this series?

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Again... Absolutely!

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Righto then, here it is.

The team visits an warzone to capture a live zoanthrope. Cells are repaired, complaints are made, Space Marines are met, the team gets a crash course in Grav-chute usage, Twitch completely snaps, and the captain is perpetually angry.

Part 12: Tyranid Acquisition Experts

HTML Link: https://googledrive.com/host/0B3Z9sXPTD9rpN2owNGdVWmdFWXM/agp.html

(Any image loading problems can be addressed by shift-reloading, I'll upgrade the HTML soon)

Album Link: http://imgur.com/gallery/iVHrS/

Original Thread Link: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/40747009

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Just got started on reading this... love it!