So I have an idea for a campaign, but really need some help in making it more believable, I’m going to put up what I have so far, and I hope with the help of the community i hope it can become even more than it is…

An Imperial Moff who collect rare and very valuable jedi artefacts who visits The Ace of Saber which is located on the planet Kluistar (if anyone has read or owns Wretched Hives of Scum & Villany from WEG Era)

Basically the Ace of Sabers is a massive gambling complex. Much like Las Vegas but all in on giant complex, but the whole place is a front to a nasty Hutt who hates all other Hutts Named Sibarra the Hutt. The entire building is rigged with Holo cameras and hidden audio eavesdroppers. And has over heard the Moffs dealing in trying to obtain Illegal Jedi Artefacts.

So Sibarra has hired someone to steal one of the Artefacts from the Moffs home. (I am assuming that Jedi artefacts would be illegal to possess even for a Moff but then it doesn’t have to be a Jedi artefact).

The Moff then moves to try and find the item that’s been stole. But his main priority is to find out who the Puppet master is.

The players are Hired by one of Sibarra’s associates without them knowing who has actually hired them. They are to rondaview with a ship in mid space, then to take the item to a dead drop zone.

The main plot of the current story though is that they are transporting medical and supplies to a remote pineal clonally. Which will while they are there, the prisoners start a mass prison escape.

But eventually the players will drop the package off at the drop zone, where the moff not far behind there tail will take the item from the drop zone.

What this will leave for the entire campaign is the Hutt thinking that the players screwed him over, and the moff trying to track down the players to find out who hired them.

Does any one have any suggestion or Advice, to help make this game amazing? Or make more sense.

Anyone got anything?

start building encounters and writing the story you have a summary but its kinda like this make a bullet sheet like thus

Act One

Begin Scene

Meet boss to deliver

encounter to get items on ship

On route encounter

Dialogue between npc's or some player interaction

Problem

Make a porblem

give a direction for PC's to go

find a shinny object to throw in front of pc's

Make said shiney object a problem in the long term

More good news

Look for another problem to complicate delivery and such

Basicaly just start making scenes add npc's to interact with pc's and that usualy makes a good home brew

It sounds like you've got a lot of really juicy story and background information being done by NPCs (the Moff, the Hutt) that doesn't seem to have a way of being brought front and center to the attention of the players. This kind of subterfuge and mystery works pretty well in most media, but I find in a roleplaying game you run a big risk of all these cool ideas never being understood or discovered by your audience, the other players, and thus resulting to nothing.

My suggestion would be to make the parts of your story that you find really fun and exciting, like this whole idea of a Moff hunting jedi artifacts, and thrust the group right into it. When in doubt, err on the side of obvious. Sometimes you've got to really spell out these devious plats for your group, and that's ok. So for example, I might have the Moff hire the Crew directly to recover a jedi artifact, and have them know that is what they are setting out to steal. That could be a really cool scenario if they have to win a gambling contest to get the artifact. Like Las Vegas, right? Casino Royale? As Tassedar excellently suggested, THEN you add in some sort of unforeseen complication or twist to the heist to take the story in an unexpected direction, like they discover that the artifact is a fake, or it gets stolen by a rival thief or jedi, or the Moff they are working for gets caught by Imperial authorities, or pirates attack the casino, etc etc.