XG-1 "Star Wing" Assault Gunboat Thread

By FTS Gecko, in X-Wing

But the Gunboat has no character development, They haven't even told us about it's childhood, whether it was bullied by all the Tie Defenders. It just goes out there with it's tonnes of missiles. I mean have they ever shown it training with those missiles? learning how to carry more than one? Was there a training montage where it learnt to twin link them. Did they ever show us the backstory on that pivot mount.... I THINK NOT...

But the Gunboat has no character development, They haven't even told us about it's childhood, whether it was bullied by all the Tie Defenders. It just goes out there with it's tonnes of missiles. I mean have they ever shown it training with those missiles? learning how to carry more than one? Was there a training montage where it learnt to twin link them. Did they ever show us the backstory on that pivot mount.... I THINK NOT...

But the Gunboat has no character development, They haven't even told us about it's childhood, whether it was bullied by all the Tie Defenders. It just goes out there with it's tonnes of missiles. I mean have they ever shown it training with those missiles? learning how to carry more than one? Was there a training montage where it learnt to twin link them. Did they ever show us the backstory on that pivot mount.... I THINK NOT...

Like everything Star Wars, you need to be fanboy enough to dig into the supplimentary material to get that level of detail. :P

Gunboats syndrome is a relatively rare condition that was first induced by TIE Fighter in 1994. Gunboats syndrome comprises any one of a series of delusions that range from a belief that posting incessantly will galvanize its release; its design reflects that of an Imperial ship, to insisting that the gunboat has a role that is not already filed by another more capable ship.

Cases have been reported in patients with nostalgia disorders, aesthetic association disorders, and among those possessing a computer and flight stick during the 90’s. Most cases of Gunboats are more responsive to electroshock therapy than to pharmacological treatment although intravenous doses of LRS or GC have proven effective. We present the case of a recent poster with Gunboats syndrome, in the context of depression, to illustrate both how impairing the condition can be and how a course of effective, individualized therapy can improve outcome.

Case report

{redacted}, a 53-year-old Filipino woman, was admitted to the psychiatric unit when their family called 911 because the patient was complaining that the Gunboat should be released, that it had a unique role relevant to Xwing, and wanted to be allowed to post to the forums so that they could be with their internet friends. Upon interview in the hospital, the patient expressed fear that “gunboat haters” were trying to burn down the thread where they were posting with other gunboat admirers. In a rare moment of cognizance they also admitted to hopelessness, low energy, decreased appetite, and somnolence.

{redacted} reported that they had been wearing rose colored glasses while on the forums (where they had posted for the last X years), but could not recall the last time something new had been discussed regarding the Gunboat.

After designer intent causes were ruled out, treatment with Lambdazapine was started. The patient was initially reluctant to take medication or eat. They subsequently developed a perceived faction imbalance (no cheap cannon carrier or Xwing equivalent), which preceded the release of additional TIE models. The patient became isolative, spending much of the day posting on the forums and neglecting their personal hygiene and grooming.

With their family’s support, the decision was made to take the patient to court for treatment over objection. Subsequently, the patient’s medication regimen was Punisherpropion IT and Lambdazapine. Within a day, the patient had a violent reaction to Punisherpropion IT, necessitating transfer to a medical unit.

After three days, they returned to the Xwing forum where their medication regimen included Lambdazapine, Defenderlopram (because of the reaction to Punisherpropion), and Preparation H (for ****hurt).

{redacted} showed improvement in symptoms over one month on Lambdazapine 25mg daily, Defenderlopram 20mg daily, and Gammazepam 2mg daily. At discharge they regressed to nihilistic or paranoid delusions and hallucinations and expressed hopefulness about the Gunboats future and a desire to purchase custom miniatures until FFG officially released it.

Edited by McFoy

I definitely do have nostalgia, and possessed many flight sticks in the 90s (and still do).

Which one is me. lol?

I definitely do have nostalgia, and possessed many flight sticks in the 90s (and still do).

Which one is me. lol?

I'm sorry to say but you very likely have Gunboats.

Vader-Do-Not-Want_1200_709_81_s.jpg

Gunboats syndrome is a relatively rare condition that was first induced by TIE Fighter in 1994. Gunboats syndrome comprises any one of a series of delusions that range from a belief that posting incessantly will galvanize its release; its design reflects that of an Imperial ship, to insisting that the gunboat has a role that is not already filed by another more capable ship.

Cases have been reported in patients with nostalgia disorders, aesthetic association disorders, and among those possessing a computer and flight stick during the 90’s. Most cases of Gunboats are more responsive to electroshock therapy than to pharmacological treatment although intravenous doses of LRS or GC have proven effective. We present the case of a recent poster with Gunboats syndrome, in the context of depression, to illustrate both how impairing the condition can be and how a course of effective, individualized therapy can improve outcome.

Case report

{redacted}, a 53-year-old Filipino woman, was admitted to the psychiatric unit when their family called 911 because the patient was complaining that the Gunboat should be released, that it had a unique role relevant to Xwing, and wanted to be allowed to post to the forums so that they could be with their internet friends. Upon interview in the hospital, the patient expressed fear that “gunboat haters” were trying to burn down the thread where they were posting with other gunboat admirers. In a rare moment of cognizance they also admitted to hopelessness, low energy, decreased appetite, and somnolence.

{redacted} reported that they had been wearing rose colored glasses while on the forums (where they had posted for the last X years), but could not recall the last time something new had been discussed regarding the Gunboat.

After designer intent causes were ruled out, treatment with Lambdazapine was started. The patient was initially reluctant to take medication or eat. They subsequently developed a perceived faction imbalance (no cheap cannon carrier or Xwing equivalent), which preceded the release of additional TIE models. The patient became isolative, spending much of the day posting on the forums and neglecting their personal hygiene and grooming.

With their family’s support, the decision was made to take the patient to court for treatment over objection. Subsequently, the patient’s medication regimen was Punisherpropion IT and Lambdazapine. Within a day, the patient had a violent reaction to Punisherpropion IT, necessitating transfer to a medical unit.

After three days, they returned to the Xwing forum where their medication regimen included Lambdazapine, Defenderlopram (because of the reaction to Punisherpropion), and Preparation H (for ****hurt).

{redacted} showed improvement in symptoms over one month on Lambdazapine 25mg daily, Defenderlopram 20mg daily, and Gammazepam 2mg daily. At discharge they regressed to nihilistic or paranoid delusions and hallucinations and expressed hopefulness about the Gunboats future and a desire to purchase custom miniatures until FFG officially released it.

mcfoy.jpg

Just a continuation of my studies relating to the various faces of Gunboat Dysphoria. I'm well on track to submitting it all for peer review thanks to you folks.

Hello, my name is DariusAPB. I've had gunboats for many years now.

At first it wasn't a problem, I just wish'ed I could Ion, you know? I mean, I couldn't hang out with the defenders, but that's ok... sometimes as an Imperial, I just wanted to Y-wing.

It's gotten worse recently. I've found I can't beam the way I wanted to, and I still I just can't even Cygnus /startscrying.

Now, when I fly TIE's, i don't feel anything. It's like, I don't feel anything unless I'm Gunboating.

Now, all I ever do is fly Y-wings with ions, Gunboating is a gateway to Rebelling and Y-wing spam.

Please, raise Gunboat awareness today.

Diabeetus.

Edited by DariusAPB

Hello, my name is DariusAPB. I've had gunboats for many years now.

At first it wasn't a problem, I just wish'ed I could Ion, you know? I mean, I couldn't hang out with the defenders, but that's ok... sometimes as an Imperial, I just wanted to Y-wing.

It's gotten worse recently. I've found I can't beam the way I wanted to, and I still I just can't even Cygnus /startscrying.

Now, when I fly TIE's, i don't feel anything. It's like, I don't feel anything unless I'm Gunboating.

Now, all I ever do is fly Y-wings with ions, Gunboating is a gateway to Rebelling and Y-wing spam.

Please, raise Gunboat awareness today.

Diabeetus.

What happened to your face?

With the release of Codex: Deathwatch I went full Space Marine.

The fact that this thread won't die gives me hope for humanity.

With the release of Codex: Deathwatch I went full Space Marine.

Since Forgeworld started doing proper minis it's Horus Heresy or nothing. 'cause f*** GW's 40k.

GUNBOAT!!!!!

45882858.jpg

The fact that this thread won't die gives me hope for humanity.

Save the Gunboat... Save the dream!

Save the cheerleader save the world.

lol mania induced double post.

Edited by flyboymb

Oh heck no, I'm doubling down on the sickness. Not only is FFG going to release the Gunboat, but it's going to be the most awesome expansion they've ever put out. If you buy 5 of them, you get a special upgrade ability where they can combine to form a giant mecha that can sweep the battlefield with plasma bolts. And do you know what this group of 5 will be called? TAU SQUADRON. Because you can't have that many things named Tau and not have a giant mothergussing robot involved.

And everybody will buy them and there will be rioting in the streets as the poor fools who could only find 4 scream promises of firstborn sons, organs, and unholy favors at the FLGS owners in exchange for that coveted final piece of the puzzle. The FFG execs will sit back in their swimming pool full of money and wonder why they insisted on releasing wave after wave of TIEs for the Imperials instead of having just an ounce of creativity to give them something else. They'll charge more for one Gunboat than two Raiders combined and it will only have vanilla cards. But it's the perfect product so it won't matter.

It's

the

GUNBOAT!

Guys, guys.

Tone it down, because there are people that actually believe that you are like that for real.

Push it further, and you will have Joe Boss here in not time exorcising us all with his emotes, his bolded jargon, and his pictures of wolves and caloric-bomb breakfasts...

I'm warning you.

It's okay, I'm just testing the waters before releasing a 'Where's the Gunboat FFG?' T-shirt for people to buy before Nationals. A 200+ page thread might not sway the devs, but poly-cotton blends cannot be ignored.

Guys, guys.

Tone it down, because there are people that actually believe that you are like that for real.

Push it further, and you will have Joe Boss here in not time exorcising us all with his emotes, his bolded jargon, and his pictures of wolves and caloric-bomb breakfasts...

I'm warning you.

Oh please not again ...

assault_gunboats_by_fj4-d8htsu7.png

It's okay, I'm just testing the waters before releasing a 'Where's the Gunboat FFG?' T-shirt for people to buy before Nationals. A 200+ page thread might not sway the devs, but poly-cotton blends cannot be ignored.

Been there, done that. Yavin Open:

Yavin_zpseaikszuo.jpg

Those are incredible.

Great news everyone: we've recruited Forest Whitaker

gerreraboat_zpsmjmihlus.png

Edited by FTS Gecko

Those are incredible.

Cheers! They got quite a lot of positive comments on the day as well, there's a hell of a lot of X-Wing PC series fans out there, not just on the forums