We.. as in you and I...
I have not played in any competitive competitions, and I do not find that significant.. competitive play so far has been heavily played with swarms.. and in an atmosphere of many ships the finesse of the game disappears in my opinion..
Competitions are frought with people who overanalize the game and who play to beat down the competition, it also takes a few months to have people figure out the winning combos...
When you play games in your local groups the dynamics are different, unless you have a group of tournament players.. most of my friends are playing to have fun.. we play lists that we think will be fun to run and sometimes we win and sometimes we lose.. I an going to try to get into some tourneys soon, but I have things going on mow that may make it harder for me to get there..
No offense, but if you've never played in any competitive competitions, I'm not sure you're the best person to speak to the atmosphere, what kind of lists are favored, and how everyone plays. I've been in several tournaments and played at Worlds this year, and I don't think I've played against a single swarm yet in that setting (there have been some, but they haven't been overwhelmingly favored by a long stretch).
And while some of the people can certainly be intense, I've got a friend who plays casual games much more intensely and aggressively than anybody I've faced in 'competitive' competition thus far. In fact I've met a few truly friendly, good people who were a pleasure to play, win or lose.
It feels like you're judging everyone who competes against an unfair and not particularly accurate stereotype.