The opening paragraph to the "Edge of the Empire" needs to really set the context for everything that follows and it needs to be "Star Wars." The biggest flaw in this paragraph is that its descriptive instead of narrative. From what I've gathered so far this RPG is big on dramatic, cinematic role playing that makes the mechanics serve the narrative. The opening paragraph needs to reflect that.
The movies open in a grand, cinematic, narrative fashion, the initial paragraph should follow that example. That doesn't have to be a cheesy "scroll" in book form, but it needs to tell a story that sets the tone vs. describing a tone. The rest of the book doesn't need that, but make me excited about the universe I'm about to step into. "Life isn't easy on the edge" is not exciting, its not epic. I want to be able to read that first paragraph to my group and have them excited about being a part of this universe regardless of whether or not they are Star Wars fans.
I'd probably order that section like this.
- Epic, narrative introduction
- Game overview
- Player Characters
- It Takes All Kinds
- Career Opportunities
- Rest the same…
My reasoning is this. As a player I want the context (said narrative), the game overview, my role as a player, inspiration for creating a character to play.
How critical is this? lol. Probably not at all. With Star Wars on the outside and the obvious quality of the writing and mechanics, I think this is going to be a big success. But on the other hand, that's why I want that opening paragraph deserves that extra love and attention to get that first introduction just right.
