A sticky thread for editing and proofreading comments on Chapter IX - The Game Master.

Page:194: Adjudicating Destiny Points

First paragraph left top of page. "See page 22 for a complete…" should read "See page 23 for a complete…."

Here are some suggested revisions for Chapter IX: The Game Master . Obviously, these are only suggestions, and I could be completely wrong. Also, some suggestions may be contrary to design intent, for example suggestions to talents. Also, corrections to page numbers are probably unnecessary given those are likely to change with the addition of flavor and art.

page 187, col 1, para 1 - “Welcome to the first step in becoming an Edge of the Empire GM. . . . This Chapter walks new GMs . . .” - Changed Game Master and Game Masters to GM and GMs, respectively.

page 187, col 1, para 2 - “The GM has many responsibilities . . .” Changed Game Master to GM.

How to Run and Edge of the Empire Game

page 188, col 1, para 1 - “This section guides new and experienced GMs through a typical game.” Changed Game Masters to GMs.

Interpreting the Dice Pool

page 188, col 1, para 6 - “Success indicated by a Proficiency die can mean something different than if it occurs on an Ability or Boost die.” Changed capitalization of “ability” to “Ability.”

page 188, col 2, para 6 - “Instead, [success symbol], [failure symbol], and other indicators will be spread across different dice in different amounts. It will often be up to the GM to decide which of the [success symbol] or [failure symbol] is relevant to the story interpretation.” Changed “Success” and “Failure” to their corresponding symbols.

Using Boost & Setback Dice

page 188 - subheading “USING BOOST AND SETBACK DICE” - Changed “&” to “AND” to match other subheads, such as “THE EMPIRE AND THE FORCE” on p. 186.

page 188, col 1, 8 - “Alternatively, the [boost die] may be used to reward a player for good planning or creative thinking. . . . If the player comes up with a good idea, and the GM wants to allow it, he add [boost die].”. Changed “maybe” to “may be” changed “Player Character” to player since the sentence seems to be about the player not her character. Added a comma after “good idea” and before “and.”

page 189, col 1, para 3 - “Obligation, when triggered in a game session, inflicts strain on the affected characters (see Obligation on page 30).” Added page cite for Obligation.

page 189, Table 9-1: Fear Guidelines - “Something reputed to be dangerous” - Sixth cell from the top in the right column. Period removed because other similar cells have no period.

Effects of Fear

page 190, col 1, para 1 - “[Threat symbol] and [advantage symbol] carry effects regardless of success or failure. If multiple fear checks are needed, [Threat symbol] and [advantage symbol] of later rolls may cancel out . . .” Changed Threats and Advantages to corresponding symbols.

Character Death

page 190, col 2, para 1 - “Perceived favoritism in the GM’s handling of different deaths between different PCs can . . .” Changed Player Characters to PCs.

Using Obligation

page 190, col 1, para 11 - “Obligation is a core narrative and game mechanic in Edge of the Empire (see page 30 for more information).” Changed “See” to “see” and changed page cite to page 30.

page 190, col 1, para 12 - “Since the PCs gain additional . . . Obligation also provides a wealth of . . . each PC has and when it is triggered.” Changed Player Characters and Player Character to PCs and PC, respectively.

Guiding Starting Obligation Selection

page 191, col 1, para 2 - “The GM should make sure that any PCs with Obligations . . .” Changed Player Characters to PCs.

Using the Obligation Threshold

page 191, col 2, para 2 - “Where the Obligation threshold . . . it might be for the PCs to talk with . . .” Changed Player Characters to PCs.

page 191, col 2, para 4 - “The GM should feel free to alter this to match the PCs’ specific obligations. . . “ Changed Player Characters’ to PCs’

page 191 TABLE 9-3 - Last cell in the right column - Changed Player Characters to PCs.

page 192, col 1, para 2 - “The GM also has the option . . . if a group’s total Obligation meets . . .” Changed capitalization of “Group’s” to “group’s.”

Managing Obligation Resources

page 192, col 1, para 3 - “The GM should seek to craft interesting or compelling options so that the PC’s decision . . .” Changed Player Character’s to PC’s.

page 192, col 1, para 4 - “If the PCs use it like credits . . .” Changed Player Characters to PCs.

page 192, col 2, para 1 - “. . . addition of a new Obligation type, such as Blackmail, Bounty, Criminal, and Debt.” Usually specific obligation types are capitalized in the text. See the paragraph immediately below the subhead Managing Minimal Obligation listing “Family, Obsession, and Responsibility.”

Managing Obligation Settlement

page 192, col 2, para 2 - “PCs should have the opportunity . . . to a minimum of one PC once per adventure.” Changed Player Characters and Player Character to PCs and PC, respectively.

Managing Minimal Obligation

page 192, col 2, para 5 - “This is represented by the minimum 5 Obligation per PC limit.” Changed Player Character to PC.

Player Motivations And How To Use Them

Managing Motivations

page 193, col 1, para 2 - “Motivations, especially those determined randomly, may conflict with the assumed PC goals . . .” Changed Player Character to PC.

page 192, col 1, para 2 - “After initial character creation, the GM should be able to better predict how the PCs’ Motivations may interact . . .” Changed “their” to “PCs’” to add clarity.

Adjudicating Destiny Points

page 194, col 1, para 1 - “Generally speaking, the PCs are the . . .” Changed Player Characters to PCs.

page 194, col 1, para 1 - “GMs may similarly use light side points with the PCs’ allies . . .” Changed Player Character’s to PCs’.

page 194, col 1, para 1 - Text references p. 22 for more information on Destiny Points - should say p. 23. EDIT ALREADY IDENTIFIED BY SOLILOQUIES

Encouraging Destiny Point Use

page 194, col 1, para 5 - “. . . the difficulty of the PCs’ current approach. . . . Perhaps the PCs have taken the wrong path . . .” Changed Player Characters’ and Player Characters to PCs’ and PC, respectively.

p. 194 column 1 paragraph 1

Original sentence:

"The characters typically use light side points to increase their chances to achieve their goals, with the GM typically uses dark side points to hinder and obstruct them."

After the comma, "with" is not an appropriate conjunction in this sentence. One possible revision would be to change uses to using.

I think a better revision would be to change with to and or while. I prefer "while" because it emphases the contrast between the PCs and the GM.

Suggested revision:

"The characters typically use light side points to increase their chances to achieve their goals, while the GM typically uses dark side points to hinder and obstruct them."

REWARDING MOTIVATIONS p.193

Im not sur if this is a mistake but the end of the first sentence seems a bit off to me.

…10xp reward for an exceptional session once per the characters life. I think the word

per should be removed.

TABLE 9-2 p.190

Third row, secon column: Cost is wrong

Third row, third column: characters are non longer limited to 3 specializations.

Locksathy said:

Table 9-1

p. 189, Example row 7

“Sarlacc” should not be capitalized

Using Obligation

p. 190, para 1, sent 1

“See” should not be capitalized