This was a short story I had to write for my social studies class...until I switched the setting to a 40k universe and things went of track from there and I want your guys opinion on how it is

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I step up to the docking bay of the Rouge Trader, Ventus Servetus. Behind me a cell of acolytes stand behind me. The captain of the ship steps up to me. His hand resting on his power sword, ready to draw it if necessary. “Who are you?” The captain says. “Cause if your one of the pilgrims going to the Frontier World I can’t let you on my ship.” I glare at him from underneath my wide brimmed hat. “Do you think I care” I say. I grab him by the front of his shirt, pulling towards me so that we are eye to eye. I reach into my pocket and pull out my rosette and bring it to his face. His eyes widen and he jerks back from me stumbling away before darting into the ship. I flick my hand and enter into the ship, my acolyte’s following me.
I step into the bridge and squads of Imperial Guardsmen surround me. I flick my eyes at the Guardsmen, some old and some new recruits. “Why are you here” The captain says stepping forward. “I just need to check out the planet you are exploring, Vanderlin was it?” I say with a taunting tone “You would not harm an Inquisitor would you?”
The Guardsmen flinch at the word and start to back away. “And I’m not interested in your Xenos Warp drive Captain, I’m not from the Ordo Xenos” I say stepping forward. He grits his teeth and glares at me with accusation. “I do not believe you Inquisitor” He says with a growl “But I have to deal with it…don’t I?” I give him a wicked grin. “Yes you do Captain, whether you like it or not, this ship is being used by the Holy Ordos” I say tapping my foot.
“Well how much do you have one you Inquisitor” he says, saying the last word as if it was poison. “I have my power sword, bolt pistol and my power armor. All weighing 39.5 kilograms” I say with an arrogant tone. “Best quality power armor? That had to be a fortune to pay...and you must be rich” He says with a sly tone. “If you’re thinking about robbing me don’t try...I have a friend on your ship…watching you at all times” I say my hand now resting on my power sword “I ‘suggest’ you start your journey towards the planet…now.” He grits his teeth and says something in a language I could not understand. The Guardsmen let out a visible sigh of relief, their shoulders going down. The Captain of the ship walks away and the ship lets out a shudder as it goes into the warp, heading towards our destination.
My eyes snap opens and I see a lankier version of me standing there. He has blue skins and multiple eyes across his body. He gives me a wicked grin. “You should give in to chaos Inquisitor…You can gain more power from my master, Tzeencth” The creature says. “Sure…over my freaking dead body you Daemon scum bag!” I say glaring at the Daemon. It lets out a shrill laughter that could shatter windows and break ear drums. I wince at the sound of its hideous laughter. It looks at her and gives me a wicked grin, obviously enjoying my pain. “Ah such power that could be harnessed from a Psyker like you” It says before fading away. I close my eyes and rub my head in frustration.
The Ventus Servetus bursts through the warp and into the Material plane once more. I look though the window and see the planet we are going towards. The planet was red, like Mars but had large patches off green across it. It was like the Mars of old, before the Adeptus Mechanicus got their hands on it and turned it into their Forge World. “So this is the planet” I say looking down at it. I close my eyes and reach out to the planet with my psychic senses. I wince as I feel raw and untamable power fluxes from the planet. “By the God-Emperor please let it not be Orks…I hate Orks!” I say underneath my breath. I stand up and walk towards the lobby. I duck as a sword nearly cleaves off my head. I look up and see the Captain standing above me, with a twisted and black blade.
“That was not a power sword was it Captain” I say, my words venomous. “So what! It’s still my sword Inquisitor! And you shall die by it!” He says with maniacle laughter. I draw out my power sword, its blade pulsing with unseen energy. He dives at me with the sword and I parry it with my power sword with ease. “How did you get that sword Captain?” I ask, already knowing the answer “Did you pledge your soul to a daemon or steal it from a major chaos cult leader?” I say. I dig my blade into the captain’s side. He lets out a screech as his side split apart easily from the force of my sword. I bring up my sword and the blade cuts through him, digging through his heart. He slumps to the ground and lets out a gurgling noise before his eyes mist over.
My acolytes rush out and look at the dead captain. I look at my acolyte cell and smile. I had an imperial world cleric, a hive world assassin, a noble born scum and a forge world tech priest. I turn to my cleric and stare him down. “Give me your hammer…now!” I bark at the frail man. He pulls out a large hammer, much bigger than him. He hands it over to me and I take it in my hands and slam it several times over the sword, the blade cracking before shattering. A daemonic howl comes out of the blade before quickly disappearing. “I’m glad you’re a Null” I say patting the assassins shoulder.
The ship lands on the planet and I step out, musty air filling my lungs. “Stay in your cell and search the area” I bark at my acolytes. They shiver and run off into the forest. “I have my own exploration” I say walking off into the forest. I close my eyes and reach out with my psychic senses. The raw force is close and near to me. “Must be a huge Ork Waagh” I mutter distaste in my voice. I press forward and halt, an ominous presence near me. I whip around and I see nothing there but my senses are screaming that something or someone is here with me. I shiver, this was unlike a Nulls presence but something warp tainted.
I press on, screams of victory and rage echoing out. I duck into some bushes and look out. There had to be over 9,000 orks in the area. In the middle of the orks was an extremely large on, with a large, shoddy claw like attachment on its left arm. “Orks and a whole **** bunch of them” I mutter. “If only I had an army of my Tau allies” I mutter “Time to burn them with fire!” I get up and gather my will. A flaming red ball of energy appears above the orks and they look up at it, gasping. “It be purrty!” “Dats shiny!” “Me wants it!” Several orks yell out from the crowd. “Burn, Holocaust!” I shout. The orks whip around snarling before screaming as a fire storm erupts from the fire ball and engulfs them. I keep my eyes closed and keep forcing the Holocaust to expand, bringing in every single ork.
I slump to the ground and look up, fatigue covering my entire body. “Oh by the God-Emperor…not you,” I growl. The travesty daemon of me leers above me, its face in a wide grin. “You brought me into thi- Grrk!” The daemon chokes as a giant metal claw grabs it by the throat and lifting it into the air. The giant ork holds the wiggling daemon in his grasp before tightening of the claw and a sharp snap is heard before the daemon falls limp and dissipates. “You puny Humi shall die!” He says raising his power claw up, his face contorting with anger. He swings his claw down and I close my eyes.
Is this the end for me? I open my eyes after a several seconds to see a figure in black armor standing in front of me. He had to be at least 8 feet tall and his armor had flames painted on it and bones strapped to his legs and shoulder pads. “That’s Adeptus power armor…” I say. The figure holds the orks arm up with ease. “Who is yo- Gah!” the ork screams as the figure kicks him in the stomach, sending him flying. The figure pulls out a large bolter and let’s looses a flurry of bolts at the ork. The ork screams and the figure pulls out a large knife and digs it into the ork before twisting the dagger and pushing it right through the orks chest. The ork looks down at him and lets out a snarl before falling limp back wards.
I approach the figure and he turns to look at me. “You’re a space marine…one of the Legion of the Damned” I say “By order of the Ordo Obsoletus you are to come with me...NOW!” I say drawing out my power sword. The marine stares at me and I blink. I stare at where the marine stood, as if he was never there! I grin and slump to the ground. “Hopefully the acolytes are not dead yet…if they are no big problem plenty of planets in the Imperium to recruit more from” I say getting up and heading towards the ship, a smile of satisfaction on my face.