so how does this play out? A bomblet goes off that damages multiple ships. the bomb dropping player has Sabine. ship one rolls for damage, does the player with Sabine need to decide to deal the extra damage or save it for one of the next ships then? or does the player get to wait till all damage is delt to all ships, then select which gets the extra?

Sabine's card says 'before a friendly bomb token is removed'. Since discarding the token is the last step in resolving a bomb's effect -after damage has been rolled- I would say that you wait until all damage has been dealt, and then decide.

ok, cool. that's the way we've been playing it.