You know it's a bad day in the Deathwatch when...(humor)

By Professor Tanhauser, in Deathwatch

...the omega vault opens, your watch commander goes in to retrieve whatever it has to offer, and moments later comes running out full speed, screaming in terror and waving his arms around over his head.

...you get news in the morning saying that every ork in leaving the sector at full speed, then in the afternoon find out they're leaving to avoid a new hive fleet coming in.

...an inquisitor receives a mysterious package from the omega vault, takes it into his quarters and a few minutes later blows his head off with a bolt pistol.

...a servitor monitoring the long range augury suddenly screams, runs to the nearest airlock and throws himself out of it.


...a servitor monitoring the long range augury suddenly screams, runs to the nearest airlock and throws himself out of it.

Then we are not in the Deathwatch, we are in the Abnettverse.

You're told your mission is to go to the planet Morticoccus and find out why the last kill team sent to it hasn't reported back yet. Also you can't be told why they were sent there because that's classified.

Upon planetfall, your KT encounters named characters from Codex: Chaos Daemons.

(this happened to me. I dieded).

...a servitor monitoring the long range augury suddenly screams, runs to the nearest airlock and throws himself out of it.

Then we are not in the Deathwatch, we are in the Abnettverse.

With me it would calmly turn around and start talking creepy nonsense like: "He sees you. He sees you! The eyes are open!"

Edited by Robin Graves

... The GM gets a nostalgic hair up his but, homebrews some really old school (like 2nd edition) necrons and now all your weapons stop working. Joy!

... Your team consists of nothing but Dark angels and space wolves. Who think settling old honour duels is more important then the mission.

... you are all issued vortex grenades by a cheerfull inquistor with the words: "It's an easy mission, you probably won't even need them."

... you are tasked with delivering a package to tarzyn the infinte.

Trazyn the infinite...

Hopefully the package ccontains some really rare Pokemon....

Edited by Professor Tanhauser

pokemon, ambulls, A pack or rabid carnifexes... same thing really ;)

how about some tyranid zoats? ;)

he sais he's already has those. and the same goes for squats, snotlings and chaos androids ;)

How about some imperial suicide bombers?

In 1e 40k they has rules and models for IG units fitted with suicide bombs. They were sinners seeking redemption. the bombs were remote controlled by a commissar i think, and each had a 1-6 chance of not detonating when triggered. That was to represent the emperor's forgiveness.

I think they dropped the suicide bombers for various BS (not ballistic skill) reasons about 'encouraging suicide", "Endorsing terrorism tactics", etc.

Maybe game companies won't do suicide bomber troop rules and figures for various BS reasons, thankfully individual gamers can.

I wonder if this is why we only saw dalek suicide bombers once in Dr. Who?

Aparantly also worked wonders in X-com. Rookies don't need skills to asplode! :D

Yeah back in the days the imperial guard could take beastmen units to. I miss those days.

Edited by Robin Graves

What's that? Attack of the masked Mexican wrestler?

Strong bad. So yeah pretty much what you said. :D