Discussion Time: Opponent refusing to play you

By Lyraeus, in Star Wars: Armada

Oh dear... is it horrible that I just saw that list as command/upgrade cards that I want to make into real ones for you to print out. I'm a horrible person.

Also this thread got me doing some self reflection of my own.

I actually wanted to print out those things on an Armada Tip/rules cards you get for what comma do do and defense tokens

I will have to see how I can adapt it. I saw a decent reference card prototype there. I might be able to do something with it. Provided you haven't done so already.

I will have to see how I can adapt it. I saw a decent reference card prototype there. I might be able to do something with it. Provided you haven't done so already.

No I haven't done anything. I think they use Magic Set Editor for it but I am not sure.

I understand what you mean by not understanding the idea of being "too competitive." As Worf reminded us, if winning weren't important, you wouldn't keep score.

As to the question at hand I think Snipafist in #13 hits on the two big things. You are either too good or too much of jerk. As Eggzavier points out being good can make you be perceived like a jerk.

Having high expectations for your play can be perceived as patronizing or condescending. Expecting others to have high expectations for their own play and as having a desire to learn and improve can come across as being a jerk to those who are "just trying to have fun." It is so hard for me to not call those people liars.

They're not lying of course. They're being disingenuous. I've come to start thinking about it as a kind of "virtue signaling." They're a "good person" for not being a win at all costs player despite the "netlist" they've brought.

They might also be trying to pad their ego ahead of time if they lose. By not caring if they win they excuse themselves for losing. I've often found that those most vociferous in not caring if they win are often... well... bad players.

I also tend to think with some of those (this came from back in my pool playing days) they're sort of intentionally being bad so as to be able to comfort themselves about being good at something else in their lives. If they're a sh*tty pool player on a Friday night they can view the rest of the crappiness in their lives as not so crappy. This essentially is circling back on what people want out of the game.

One of the things to think about in understanding where folks are coming from with regards this sort of thing and thus how they might react to you is learning what their frame of reference is for measuring their personal achievement. Learn what their standard of excellence is. Learn what their perception of excellence is. Remember that is not so simple of a thing as knowing that Jack Nicklaus or Tiger Woods were excellent at golf.

I've found that people who share my standards and perceptions in that regard tend to not find me condescending or "too competitive."

This makes sense to me.

I get not everyone thinks along the lines I do. Where Drasnighta is very manual knowledgeable, I have an innate sense of Tactics. That is my thing. I get most people do not. With that I really halve to learn to understand that and go by the checklist Drasnighta posted.

Ok, this is a bit tongue in cheek, but sometimes I've uttered this phrase to myself when I think I might be turning down a dark ally.

"If you think your being an ars, you are probably being a giant one. If you dont think your being an ars, your probably are."

Another consideration.. there is your end, and his end.. if one guy says this to you, talk to a few other players and ask if you push the envelope at times. It could be as much his sensitivity as your conduct just overlapping gray areas. In that case, work on improving your relationship with the one guy as you can, and stay mindful of your conduct at times, but don't beat yourself up if it's just one or two guys being sensitive.

it might be a good idea to bring "fun" lists, and "competitive lists" and then ask your opponent which they are up for...

Yeah, I need some new fun lists, feel guilty every game where I bring the mc30s now. Need base ideas though.

This kind of hits on something I've noticed: certain types of lists are just frustrating/not fun to play against, particularly if you're not well-versed in the game. These are the kinds of lists that can present seemingly unwinnable situations for new players.

I found that I was running into this a lot when I was running my CR90B swarm regularly--something about the inevitability of that 3 damage every. Single. Shot. is very frustrating for people. Particularly coupled with Rieekan. The things that made it fun for me to play were the very things that made it frustrating to play against.

Similarly, Dodonna lists can be very frustrating, particularly against someone who is newer, if you have to keep reminding them right after they've flipped a crit that wasn't so bad:

"Whew, it's just Disengaged Fire Control."

"Yeah, you don't actually get that, why don't you hand me that and three more and let me pick the worst possible one for you? Oh look, Comm Noise to speed 0, isn't that a tough break?"

Same thing with DeMSU lists.

Maybe consider if the sorts of lists you're bringing is frustrating to play against? I stopped playing the SW90 swarm in any casual play for this reason.

Note, I'm not saying take lists that aren't good. You can have a list that's good but not frustrating, and vice versa. Does every opponent groan when they see you pull out your list? That's a good sign it's unfun for them. :)

it might be a good idea to bring "fun" lists, and "competitive lists" and then ask your opponent which they are up for...

Yeah, I need some new fun lists, feel guilty every game where I bring the mc30s now. Need base ideas though.

This kind of hits on something I've noticed: certain types of lists are just frustrating/not fun to play against, particularly if you're not well-versed in the game. These are the kinds of lists that can present seemingly unwinnable situations for new players.

I found that I was running into this a lot when I was running my CR90B swarm regularly--something about the inevitability of that 3 damage every. Single. Shot. is very frustrating for people. Particularly coupled with Rieekan. The things that made it fun for me to play were the very things that made it frustrating to play against.

Similarly, Dodonna lists can be very frustrating, particularly against someone who is newer, if you have to keep reminding them right after they've flipped a crit that wasn't so bad:

"Whew, it's just Disengaged Fire Control."

"Yeah, you don't actually get that, why don't you hand me that and three more and let me pick the worst possible one for you? Oh look, Comm Noise to speed 0, isn't that a tough break?"

Same thing with DeMSU lists.

Maybe consider if the sorts of lists you're bringing is frustrating to play against? I stopped playing the SW90 swarm in any casual play for this reason.

Note, I'm not saying take lists that aren't good. You can have a list that's good but not frustrating, and vice versa. Does every opponent groan when they see you pull out your list? That's a good sign it's unfun for them. :)

Thankfully I don't play those lists usually. Just when I really really want to win.

I think I can add a bit of perspective from the view point of a "casual" player.

In my mind there is a distinction between tournament play and casual play.

In a tournament you play to win. That is the goal. No one will ever fault you for crushing an opponent with no mercy. Its to be expected.

I love playing star wars armada casually and when I play I'd like to win, but winning isn't the goal. Having fun is the goal for me. Ironically, having fun has very little to do with whats actually happening in the game itself. I could be crushing my opponent or being crushed myself and yet still be having a blast.

The difference is the attitude of the players. To better illustrate what I mean here is a list of situations that in my mind warrant two totally different responses when playing in a tournament and playing casually.

- I forgot Boba Fetts ability when I activate him... do you remind me?

- I forgot I have leading shots on my ISD that just had a terrible roll... do you point it out?

- I forgot to use my engineering token at the appropriate time... do you let me use it out of order during that ships activation?

- I reveal a squadron command when I'm playing a list with zero squadrons... do you let me change it to the one I meant?

- I didn't declare at the beginning of my turn that I was banking my command token... do you allow it?

If your answer for the above situations are the same regardless if its a tournament or a casual friday night game then I probably don't want to play you after a long day at work when I'm looking to unwind and throw some dice. And here is my argument that allowing all of the above makes for a vastly more enjoyable game even for our more "competitive" brethren.

If your goal is to play to win and you're playing a one off game to hone your skills for an upcoming tournament then allowing all of the above will actually be a huge benefit to all parties. Because you'll be playing a game where you win because you outplayed the opposition not simply because they forgot about their upgrade cards. The harder the game is the more you get out of it. So why wouldn't you let your opponent know that double ramming your flagship with engine techs is actually a great idea, even if it means you will lose your flagship?

Lists are another thing I saw brought up. To me lists are irrelevant (although I will add a caveat that I do experience list fatigue, where given the option I don't want to play against or with a DemSU list... its a one trick pony that in my experience creates a very on dimensional game that boils down to did you get the triple tap or not?). But list fatigue will become less of an issue as more waves are released and players have more options.

This seems really long winded and disjointed but hopefully adds a little more color to an important topic.

.

The difference is the attitude of the players. To better illustrate what I mean here is a list of situations that in my mind warrant two totally different responses when playing in a tournament and playing casually.

- I forgot Boba Fetts ability when I activate him... do you remind me?

- I forgot I have leading shots on my ISD that just had a terrible roll... do you point it out?

- I forgot to use my engineering token at the appropriate time... do you let me use it out of order during that ships activation?

- I reveal a squadron command when I'm playing a list with zero squadrons... do you let me change it to the one I meant?

- I didn't declare at the beginning of my turn that I was banking my command token... do you allow it?

This I can understand. I point out this all the time. I am not here to crush people. I want more players and I want the players I do have to get better. So I will point out things. I may do a soft reminder such as "anything else you want to do?" or I do a hard reminder when we are in the thick of things "gods what a bad roll, you still got leading shots though!" but then there are times where I do a rules reminder, "are you going to use the token and command together for that concentrate fire, they have to be declared at the same time"

That is how I play, but when we get to flat out mistakes, or missed opportunities, as long as it's not well past that point, I don't mine. I will give you 1 freebie. After that freebie I am sorry, I want you to become a better player so I will hold you to that standard,but if I notice it is something they routinely forget, then I pull out the reminders.

That is my play style. It may come off as. . . Egotistical or something, I don't really know.

Being a member of the scene-in-question here, I'm acquainted with what's been going on. I've not been sure how to throw in my two cents' worth, but I think Dras has one of the best pieces of advice in the thread so far.

How can we make Lyraeus "Not a Problem" without removing him from the Armada Scene. Which, honestly, wouldn't be good for anyone....
[...]

I have a reputation as a "know it all", because my brain works in such a way that lets me digest and understand technical documents - including rulebooks - in such a way that I can interpreted rules quickly for others. Which inevitably lead to the rumour that I'd be no fun to play against, because I "Enforced the Rules."

So, I made myself a checklist.

1) Enjoy your Games. Even when they Suck.

2) Give advice when its Asked for. Not before.

3) Laugh it off. All the time. Even when it hurts you.

4) Shake Hands at the Start. Introduce with a Smile.

5) Shake Hands at the End. Win, Lose, Stomping or Close Call.

6) Engage Throughout. Silence and Concentration is easily misinterpreted for Brooding.

7) Congratulate your Opponent on the good moves they make that you didn't see... Even if you saw it.

8) Know at the end of the day, you're a perfectly fallible human being. And so is your opponent. No-one is better than the other.

Like yours, Lyraeus' brain works in magnificent ways that are useful for the game - not infallibly so, but still very impressive. That's his brain's gift. It comes at the cost of knowing how to socialize well.

In terms of #6, that's not a problem unless things are going sideways for him. Barring that, Lyraeus is fairly hyperactive at the gaming table. That relates to #2, which does tend to have an unnerving effect - especially because he's also an advocate for psychological manipulation (see here). There's a fairly constant stream of advice and criticism. On the one hand, it can be valuable (though, again, he's not infallible), but sometimes absolute mastery of the game is not the goal. Just having a low-pressure game to enjoy a Friday evening is the goal.

There's certainly more to what the person in question meant by "competitive" than the fact that Lyraeus is a very strong opponent. He told me that it was more about Lyraeus' constant pointing out of the rules. He probably didn't get that any less from me than he would have received from Lyraeus had they played, but I do think that I package it is a slightly softer way. (Starting off any comments with something brotherly like: "Hey man, I'm not sure that..." or turning things into questions rather than accusations: "Is that the way the rule works? I'm not really sure..." even when I know that I know it right.) It reduces the confrontational aspect, and puts us at more of a level, rather than at what comes across as a power distance.

Being a member of the scene-in-question here, I'm acquainted with what's been going on. I've not been sure how to throw in my two cents' worth, but I think Dras has one of the best pieces of advice in the thread so far.

How can we make Lyraeus "Not a Problem" without removing him from the Armada Scene. Which, honestly, wouldn't be good for anyone....

[...]

I have a reputation as a "know it all", because my brain works in such a way that lets me digest and understand technical documents - including rulebooks - in such a way that I can interpreted rules quickly for others. Which inevitably lead to the rumour that I'd be no fun to play against, because I "Enforced the Rules."

So, I made myself a checklist.

1) Enjoy your Games. Even when they Suck.

2) Give advice when its Asked for. Not before.

3) Laugh it off. All the time. Even when it hurts you.

4) Shake Hands at the Start. Introduce with a Smile.

5) Shake Hands at the End. Win, Lose, Stomping or Close Call.

6) Engage Throughout. Silence and Concentration is easily misinterpreted for Brooding.

7) Congratulate your Opponent on the good moves they make that you didn't see... Even if you saw it.

8) Know at the end of the day, you're a perfectly fallible human being. And so is your opponent. No-one is better than the other.

Like yours, Lyraeus' brain works in magnificent ways that are useful for the game - not infallibly so, but still very impressive. That's his brain's gift. It comes at the cost of knowing how to socialize well.

In terms of #6, that's not a problem unless things are going sideways for him. Barring that, Lyraeus is fairly hyperactive at the gaming table. That relates to #2, which does tend to have an unnerving effect - especially because he's also an advocate for psychological manipulation (see here). There's a fairly constant stream of advice and criticism. On the one hand, it can be valuable (though, again, he's not infallible), but sometimes absolute mastery of the game is not the goal. Just having a low-pressure game to enjoy a Friday evening is the goal.

There's certainly more to what the person in question meant by "competitive" than the fact that Lyraeus is a very strong opponent. He told me that it was more about Lyraeus' constant pointing out of the rules. He probably didn't get that any less from me than he would have received from Lyraeus had they played, but I do think that I package it is a slightly softer way. (Starting off any comments with something brotherly like: "Hey man, I'm not sure that..." or turning things into questions rather than accusations: "Is that the way the rule works? I'm not really sure..." even when I know that I know it right.) It reduces the confrontational aspect, and puts us at more of a level, rather than at what comes across as a power distance.

Hmmm why do I suddenly feel like Julius Ceasar. . . Like it is for the good of the game. . . :P

Being a member of the scene-in-question here, I'm acquainted with what's been going on. I've not been sure how to throw in my two cents' worth, but I think Dras has one of the best pieces of advice in the thread so far.

Like yours, Lyraeus' brain works in magnificent ways that are useful for the game - not infallibly so, but still very impressive. That's his brain's gift. It comes at the cost of knowing how to socialize well.

In terms of #6, that's not a problem unless things are going sideways for him. Barring that, Lyraeus is fairly hyperactive at the gaming table. That relates to #2, which does tend to have an unnerving effect - especially because he's also an advocate for psychological manipulation (see here). There's a fairly constant stream of advice and criticism. On the one hand, it can be valuable (though, again, he's not infallible), but sometimes absolute mastery of the game is not the goal. Just having a low-pressure game to enjoy a Friday evening is the goal.

There's certainly more to what the person in question meant by "competitive" than the fact that Lyraeus is a very strong opponent. He told me that it was more about Lyraeus' constant pointing out of the rules. He probably didn't get that any less from me than he would have received from Lyraeus had they played, but I do think that I package it is a slightly softer way. (Starting off any comments with something brotherly like: "Hey man, I'm not sure that..." or turning things into questions rather than accusations: "Is that the way the rule works? I'm not really sure..." even when I know that I know it right.) It reduces the confrontational aspect, and puts us at more of a level, rather than at what comes across as a power distance.

Hmmm why do I suddenly feel like Julius Ceasar. . . Like it is for the good of the game. . . :P

Oh, come, we're not all whipping out our knives to engage in a gang stabbing.

Being a member of the scene-in-question here, I'm acquainted with what's been going on. I've not been sure how to throw in my two cents' worth, but I think Dras has one of the best pieces of advice in the thread so far.

Like yours, Lyraeus' brain works in magnificent ways that are useful for the game - not infallibly so, but still very impressive. That's his brain's gift. It comes at the cost of knowing how to socialize well.

In terms of #6, that's not a problem unless things are going sideways for him. Barring that, Lyraeus is fairly hyperactive at the gaming table. That relates to #2, which does tend to have an unnerving effect - especially because he's also an advocate for psychological manipulation (see here). There's a fairly constant stream of advice and criticism. On the one hand, it can be valuable (though, again, he's not infallible), but sometimes absolute mastery of the game is not the goal. Just having a low-pressure game to enjoy a Friday evening is the goal.

There's certainly more to what the person in question meant by "competitive" than the fact that Lyraeus is a very strong opponent. He told me that it was more about Lyraeus' constant pointing out of the rules. He probably didn't get that any less from me than he would have received from Lyraeus had they played, but I do think that I package it is a slightly softer way. (Starting off any comments with something brotherly like: "Hey man, I'm not sure that..." or turning things into questions rather than accusations: "Is that the way the rule works? I'm not really sure..." even when I know that I know it right.) It reduces the confrontational aspect, and puts us at more of a level, rather than at what comes across as a power distance.

Hmmm why do I suddenly feel like Julius Ceasar. . . Like it is for the good of the game. . . :P

Oh, come, we're not all whipping out our knives to engage in a gang stabbing.

Sometimes I wonder. . .

Turn it positive, Dude...

"How can I be a better person?"

is a much better train of thought than

"I suck."

Hmmm why do I suddenly feel like Julius Ceasar. . . Like it is for the good of the game. . . :P

Oh, come, we're not all whipping out our knives to engage in a gang stabbing.

Sometimes I wonder. . .

It seems like the people in this thread are trying to give you pretty good advice.

But if you'd rather not hear it, I'm happy to keep my thoughts to myself. ;)

Ok, let me first say that, I didnt really have any intention to give my feeling on the mater, but as a 'filthy casual' as well, I feel compelled to point out some stuff right here that would not have me looking to ever play a person again if they did this, outside of a tournament setting.

I mean this in no disrespect to you Ly, if you are honestly looking to improve/check your person to person skills. As a lot of this outside of gaming can be applied. Relative handicaps, aside if you can manage to keep some of this in mind when playing what my little neck of the woods consider Friendly games, then hopefully (if it is a failing on your part) will improve.

This I can understand. I point out this all the time. I am not here to crush people. I want more players and I want the players I do have to get better. So I will point out things. I may do a soft reminder such as "anything else you want to do?" or I do a hard reminder when we are in the thick of things "gods what a bad roll, you still got leading shots though!" but then there are times where I do a rules reminder, "are you going to use the token and command together for that concentrate fire, they have to be declared at the same time"

You might want to adjust, "Anything else you want to do?" to: "You sure your done?". Or something of that nature. The latter deppending on some factors sounds condescending. I suggest you at least make adjustments to tone or words used.

After working in retail and public service for a while you realize, its not necessarily what you say, but how you say it. Sometimes wording something the right way, with the right amount of empathy and jocularity in your voice can go along way to easing another person. Its a hard thing to master, and even then you might not always get it right, but its very useful to learn. Especially when dealing with difficult people.

I will tell you right off, depending on the tone, if you said that to me. I likely would not be looking for a repeat match.

Also, dont point out someone elses sh*tty roll, unless you have established a repertoire with the person where you know such a comment would be taken with ease. Like someone who perpetually rolls horribly, and they poke fun at it themselves. I know it doesn't seem like much, but sometimes people see those rolls as reflections of themselves. Its no ease thing to decern at first, but in casual play, watch your opponent, do the best you can to read their body language, and if you aren't playing a game watch pay attention to the comments that go by between the people at different tables. It can help you get a read on what to expect should you play those people.

Also point out your own bad rolls. An do your best to remind someone of a forgotten upgrade in a light way.

That is how I play, but when we get to flat out mistakes, or missed opportunities, as long as it's not well past that point, I don't mine. I will give you 1 freebie. After that freebie I am sorry, I want you to become a better player so I will hold you to that standard,but if I notice it is something they routinely forget, then I pull out the reminders.

That is my play style. It may come off as. . . Egotistical or something, I don't really know.

Here I'm going to point out that this policy of yours while strict and maybe even fair in some cases, just isn't super welcoming. If we are talking about tournament practice SURE, that's fine so long as both parties know what they are getting into, but new players and casual or sporadic pop up players it is a deterrent. Hell if you are expressly in a game for teaching reasons, its fine. If not any of those however, it isn't cool.

While I realize you are trying to help them, an that's fine, hard limits on our generosity makes it seem more like patronizing in your approach. I would suggest you release your hard cap on mistakes. People I've noticed in my experience learn best when they are enjoying the subject mater. If a player is constantly worried about a missed opportunity because you dont let anything slide then they are less likely to enjoy the experience and more likely to walk away unsettled.

Ok, so caveat time. Obviously all people are different, an while I personally enjoy strict but fair teachers, it has served me well in the past to approach every new person or even familiar opponents with the lightest of touches at first. As you establish your relationship with the person you will be able to let more or less go based how they handle other situations in this vain.

Also never underestimate the value of keeping your mouth shut about your own foibles. Or the power of snacks. You know the saying, "The best way to mans heart is threw his stomach?". Well that saying applies to gamer's in general as well. It might not seem like much, hell it might even seem a little bit like bribery, but at least offering something to a friend/group mate, can go a long way ease into relationships. Especially if you find it hard to gauge someones attitude.

Anyway, take this for what you will. However, never let a chance to improve yourself even in such a small way for a small thing, slip by. Its easy to get stuck and believe "I'm fine." when really your not. I speak from experiences of my own on that.

One last thing though, an I dont mean this as a slight; but, why did you come and ask the forum about your play habits, an not the Store Owner, or fellow local Armada player? In my experience, Store Owner's will be the first to let you if somethings amiss, should you ask. That said, you might also have a hands off Owner. So forgive my impropriety in this question, but I am genuinely curios.

Being a member of the scene-in-question here, I'm acquainted with what's been going on. I've not been sure how to throw in my two cents' worth, but I think Dras has one of the best pieces of advice in the thread so far.

How can we make Lyraeus "Not a Problem" without removing him from the Armada Scene. Which, honestly, wouldn't be good for anyone....

[...]

I have a reputation as a "know it all", because my brain works in such a way that lets me digest and understand technical documents - including rulebooks - in such a way that I can interpreted rules quickly for others. Which inevitably lead to the rumour that I'd be no fun to play against, because I "Enforced the Rules."

So, I made myself a checklist.

1) Enjoy your Games. Even when they Suck.

2) Give advice when its Asked for. Not before.

3) Laugh it off. All the time. Even when it hurts you.

4) Shake Hands at the Start. Introduce with a Smile.

5) Shake Hands at the End. Win, Lose, Stomping or Close Call.

6) Engage Throughout. Silence and Concentration is easily misinterpreted for Brooding.

7) Congratulate your Opponent on the good moves they make that you didn't see... Even if you saw it.

8) Know at the end of the day, you're a perfectly fallible human being. And so is your opponent. No-one is better than the other.

Like yours, Lyraeus' brain works in magnificent ways that are useful for the game - not infallibly so, but still very impressive. That's his brain's gift. It comes at the cost of knowing how to socialize well.

In terms of #6, that's not a problem unless things are going sideways for him. Barring that, Lyraeus is fairly hyperactive at the gaming table. That relates to #2, which does tend to have an unnerving effect - especially because he's also an advocate for psychological manipulation (see here). There's a fairly constant stream of advice and criticism. On the one hand, it can be valuable (though, again, he's not infallible), but sometimes absolute mastery of the game is not the goal. Just having a low-pressure game to enjoy a Friday evening is the goal.

There's certainly more to what the person in question meant by "competitive" than the fact that Lyraeus is a very strong opponent. He told me that it was more about Lyraeus' constant pointing out of the rules. He probably didn't get that any less from me than he would have received from Lyraeus had they played, but I do think that I package it is a slightly softer way. (Starting off any comments with something brotherly like: "Hey man, I'm not sure that..." or turning things into questions rather than accusations: "Is that the way the rule works? I'm not really sure..." even when I know that I know it right.) It reduces the confrontational aspect, and puts us at more of a level, rather than at what comes across as a power distance.

Hmmm why do I suddenly feel like Julius Ceasar. . . Like it is for the good of the game. . . :P

Come on man, dont backslide on us now.

Did you come for honest opinions and advice, or to throw yourself the largest pity party you could?

Frankly a lot of people (myself excluded) have given a lot of fantastic advice. Its ultimately up to you what you do with it, but I dont think anyone here is trying to drag you down at this point. I might not always agree with you Ly, but I wrote those words above, out of genuine respect. I bet alot of people did it from the same place, or at very least concern.

Do with that advice what you will, but know this thread didn't blossom to 4 pages of 'self-help-hippy-junk' because people dont care.

Side note: Comparing yourself to Julius Ceasar, is more then a little egomaniacal. You might want to adjust down a smig.

Come on man, dont backslide on us now.

Did you come for honest opinions and advice, or to throw yourself the largest pity party you could?

Frankly a lot of people (myself excluded) have given a lot of fantastic advice. Its ultimately up to you what you do with it, but I dont think anyone here is trying to drag you down at this point. I might not always agree with you Ly, but I wrote those words above, out of genuine respect. I bet alot of people did it from the same place, or at very least concern.

Do with that advice what you will, but know this thread didn't blossom to 4 pages of 'self-help-hippy-junk' because people dont care.

Side note: Comparing yourself to Julius Ceasar, is more then a little egomaniacal. You might want to adjust down a smig.

Ouch, I guess it was missed. Mikael Hasselstein is one of the people in my play group who I look up to. I do tease him and he teases me back. It is a give and take we have. Thus the emotion at the end.

As for your advice prior to this last post, you have a point. It is a bit strict to only give 1 freebie but that comes back to something Mikael said. I give advice during a game. It is usually well received (at least I think it is since no one tells me otherwise) and I catch an issue before it occurs such at tokens not being spent.

Now, here is what happens when I give the 1 freebie. I let them know that I do give 1 and only 1 and I explain that the only way to learn is to make mistakes. 9 times out of 10, once they make that mistake and they get to fix it they are on the look out for it again and are even more careful from that point on.

I have hear of an issue where someone got mad because their maneuver ended them off the board and they wanted to take that back. I don't allow a move to be taken back. It is harsh but it is a lesson learned. Before that even occurs I point out a few turns prior that a ship looks like it is getting close to running off the table. I say it in a fun loving "on no!" fashion that helps ramp up the games feel a little. In the end I feel that a locked in maneuver tool is sacrosanct. If there is one thing in this game that should be learned above all else, it is movement and so mistakes are going to help you with that.

Darkfortunex, your words are amazing. Same with everyone else on this thread. I was looking for other stories of situations like this and how they can be fixed and such. Everyone has provided a viewpoint I did not have. That is why I love this community. Well, when we don't have ADM NEL's running around.

I talked to the store owner, Mikael, and everyone else that was there playing Armada. I wanted new view points from people around he world. Which is exactly what I got.

I wish I could do snacks. . . I may have to add a mini budget in for that or get a line of store credit paid up, but I will need a new job for that.

Hmmm why do I suddenly feel like Julius Ceasar. . . Like it is for the good of the game. . . :P

Oh, come, we're not all whipping out our knives to engage in a gang stabbing.

Sometimes I wonder. . .

It seems like the people in this thread are trying to give you pretty good advice.

But if you'd rather not hear it, I'm happy to keep my thoughts to myself. ;)

Oh shush you :P you know I value your ripened wisdom. You are like a vintage of good wine. ^_~

Turn it positive, Dude...

"How can I be a better person?"

is a much better train of thought than

"I suck."

That's what this thread is doing. The goal is improvement not moping. This I was using the self depreciating humor about me sounding like I was whining ^_~

I may have aspergers, but I have taught myself a few things.

Hey Lyraeus, from Mikael's comments it seems we may be similar players at the table. I often go for a wander when I sense a newer player is deep in thought, as its that or telling them what to do. It takes the pressure of them to be quick.

Hey Lyraeus, from Mikael's comments it seems we may be similar players at the table. I often go for a wander when I sense a newer player is deep in thought, as its that or telling them what to do. It takes the pressure of them to be quick.

I have been doing things like that recently. It has not been intentional but I guess it does help ease pressure off. . . Though when I do it, I feel like I am giving slight to an opponent. I am not giving them my full attention and thus to me, it feels like I am not giving them credit for being my adversary. . . Though that is likely the competitive side of me :P

If I see a person thinking something over, I tend to tell them: "Hey, I need to go do [something] for a moment. Take your time," and then I'll step away for a bit to go use the can or grab a beverage.

If I see a person thinking something over, I tend to tell them: "Hey, I need to go do [something] for a moment. Take your time," and then I'll step away for a bit to go use the can or grab a beverage.

That's true. I have seen you do that. I should really just tell them that I will be back in a second and they should take their time.

It is a nicer thing