Force Awakens is going to suck

By Tailsgod, in X-Wing Off-Topic

Not only is it going to be bad

its going to be so bad that we will wish for the days of Jar Jar again

so bad that I am going to never want to watch star wars again for as long as I live

Sure a ton of people are saying its amazing and its receiving critical acclaim but PEOPLE LIKED EPISODE 1 AS WELL

This is going to clearly be the worst movie of all time and will be so bad that I will never play X-wing ever again and end up throwing out my entire collection

Clearly that's how bad its going to be

Not only is it going to be bad

its going to be so bad that we will wish for the days of Jar Jar again

so bad that I am going to never want to watch star wars again for as long as I live

Sure a ton of people are saying its amazing and its receiving critical acclaim but PEOPLE LIKED EPISODE 1 AS WELL

This is going to clearly be the worst movie of all time and will be so bad that I will never play X-wing ever again and end up throwing out my entire collection

Clearly that's how bad its going to be

Feel free to send your collection to me.

I doubt it'll be as good as The Avengers (Which I hail as the greatest film of all time), but I am guessing it'll be a pleasant surprise. Maybe somewhere between Ant-Man and Guardians of the Galaxy in terms of overall quality.

Ant Man was so surprisingly fun.

Exactly. But if you walked in to it expecting the greatest movie ever.... it would have felt like a disappointment. I feel like keeping my expectations moderately low for Episode 7. It's hard to keep them low because I really like a lot of the new characters so far, especially BB-8 and Captain Phasma... and Finn looks awesome with a lightsaber! Anxious to learn more about Rey and Poe Dameron (Beyond what the comics revealed about Poe). Less interested in Kylo Ren, as I'm not a huge fan of his mask design, but I hope he gets punched in the face hard and needs to get a new mask as a result.

The way this forum gets I am having actual difficulty trying to determine if Tailsgod is being sarcastic or not. Normally I would just assume he was and go about my day, but this is the same forum where a 3 point crew upgrade led to cries of Rebels being unbeatable and someone seriously thought that you could put Long Range Scanners and TIE Shuttle on the same ship so long as you equipped them in that exact order.

Tailsgod, help me out here. Are you joking around, or are you currently under the impression that the sky is in fact falling?

My expectations for Force Awakens:

A decently good movie that is similar in style to the older movies (and the prequels aren't bad at all, just not in the same caliber as the originals).

In other words, a movie with the feel of Star Wars that just isn't Star Wars (because anything set when it is should have Darth Caedus, etc.)

Im just not setting up any big expectations... stung once before with phantom menace.

Im just going to go and see it as 'an action movie' and not build it up to be anything amazing. I've deliberately not wathced any trailers other than the first short one or read any spoilers or features on it.

The only 'spoilers' ive had to date are seeing what lego's toy line is :)

Im just not setting up any big expectations... stung once before with phantom menace.

Im just going to go and see it as 'an action movie' and not build it up to be anything amazing. I've deliberately not wathced any trailers other than the first short one or read any spoilers or features on it.

The only 'spoilers' ive had to date are seeing what lego's toy line is :)

I have a friend who did the same thing.

I wonder if avoiding all the previews might be somewhat bad. Like.... does familiarizing yourself with the characters beforehand help you accept them as the new faces of Star Wars?

I also wonder about names. Example: In Empire Strikes Back they never called Boba Fett by name - and in ROTJ they never said the word "Ewok", yet people knew them by these names at the time due to marketing. Imagine if you walk out of the theater and people are referring to their favorite scenes, using names that you don't recognize after seeing the film.

I think the OP is just setting expectations for it to be so horrible that when he sees it, he'll like it.

I saw it 9 hours ago..... won't spoil it.....watch it and find out for yourself.....

I think the OP is just setting expectations for it to be so horrible that when he sees it, he'll like it.

Noooooooo

I'm not doing that at aaaaaaaaaalllll

I have a friend who did the same thing.

I've watched a few trailers but none that give a ton away. I know a little bit like that Ren is a title and not a name. I know it's the First Order vs Resistance, ect... But anyone who plays X-Wing knew that anyway.

So far I've heard very good things about it, and I think I'll enjoy it.

But I do not expect it to have the same impact that Star Wars did (and by that I mean the movie released in 1977 that I saw when I was 8) because at that point, nothing like that had ever been done before.

The opening with the CR-90 being chased by the ISD, and back then we didn't know what they were called... Was mind blowing because it was something that never been seen before. Special effects of that nature hadn't really ever been done before so no one was prepared for it.

That means as good as TFA is, it will at best be a great story, with great effects cool fights and cool spaceships... But it can never capture the awe that Star Wars brought in 1977.

The way this forum gets I am having actual difficulty trying to determine if Tailsgod is being sarcastic or not.

here's some good tell-tale signs:

Not only is it going to be bad

its going to be so bad that we will wish for the days of Jar Jar again

so bad that I am going to never want to watch star wars again for as long as I live

Sure a ton of people are saying its amazing and its receiving critical acclaim but PEOPLE LIKED EPISODE 1 AS WELL

This is going to clearly be the worst movie of all time and will be so bad that I will never play X-wing ever again and end up throwing out my entire collection

Clearly that's how bad its going to be <--- (emphasis mine)

remember your Hamlet, gents

"the lady doth protest too much"

excessive exaggeration (which, yes, is incredibly redundant) and repetition are surefire ways to get people to doubt the validity your argument, which is exactly what you want when writing a satire :P

Edited by ficklegreendice

The way this forum gets I am having actual difficulty trying to determine if Tailsgod is being sarcastic or not.

here's some good tell-tale signs:

Not only is it going to be bad

its going to be so bad that we will wish for the days of Jar Jar again

so bad that I am going to never want to watch star wars again for as long as I live

Sure a ton of people are saying its amazing and its receiving critical acclaim but PEOPLE LIKED EPISODE 1 AS WELL

This is going to clearly be the worst movie of all time and will be so bad that I will never play X-wing ever again and end up throwing out my entire collection Clearly that's how bad its going to be <--- (emphasis mine)

remember your Hamlet, gents

"the lady doth protest too much"

excessive exaggeration (which, yes, is incredibly redundant) and repetition are surefire ways to get people to doubt the validity your argument, which is exactly what you want when writing a satire :P

Only to auffer crushing disappointment later And be as bitter as i

What I am hearing that is worrying me is that it is simply a rehash of Episode 4, and I so do not want that.

What I am hearing that is worrying me is that it is simply a rehash of Episode 4, and I so do not want that.

rehash is a strong word

just going by the trailers (so no spoilers), the movie seems structured around similar plot points as Episode 4 in a purely physical sense

escape from ISD clutches, crash land on desert planet, meet a Luke-a-like, meet solo, escape; fight deathstar etc.

these events will harken to the first movie, undoubtedly, but it'll only be a problem with the characters are exactly the same

Can't tell without having seen it, but reviews seem to indicate it's fresh enough to be thoroughly enjoyable

I've just got back from midnight opening its bad. Plot jumps all over the place, no sense of pace, some absolutely horrific acting all round. On the bright side T-70's kick absolute ass, they can pinpoint target mansized ground targets from the air and don't even seem to need to use Torpedoes to down larger targets.

Awful, awful film but great X-Wings. I'll take what I can get.

Did we watch the same film?!

Ion Dave, on 17 Dec 2015 - 04:04 AM, said:

I've just got back from midnight opening its bad. Plot jumps all over the place, no sense of pace, some absolutely horrific acting all round. On the bright side T-70's kick absolute ass, they can pinpoint target mansized ground targets from the air and don't even seem to need to use Torpedoes to down larger targets.

Awful, awful film but great X-Wings. I'll take what I can get.

Are you making some bad joke I don't understand?

I saw the midnight showing and I thought it was fantastic. Definitely an 8.5 / 10 for me. There were definitely things that I did not like at all , but it was so enjoyable overall that I can easily forgive them.

The new characters and the actors portraying them were great - in fact, I thought they stole the scenes from the old, established characters, whenever they appeared together.

Did we watch the same film?!

pst

gotta tell him that this isn't the T-70

sw_lgi_gallery_07.jpg

Y'now, when i was a preteen, hell single digits, I had this superstition... Aw hell I had loads, anyway one of them is what I called doubtitus (preteen, remember?) Basically, I figured if i thought and said something REAAAALLLY negative, the positive would come true.

No, no way mum will come back the latest issue of Your Sinclair, she did? WOOHOO doubtitus!

Kinda thought of it as my reverse superpower.

Even to this day I am still convinced that if I say something, the universe would conspire to make the opposite happen.

That's how I see this.

Edited by DariusAPB

Ion Dave, on 17 Dec 2015 - 04:04 AM, said:

I've just got back from midnight opening its bad. Plot jumps all over the place, no sense of pace, some absolutely horrific acting all round. On the bright side T-70's kick absolute ass, they can pinpoint target mansized ground targets from the air and don't even seem to need to use Torpedoes to down larger targets.

Awful, awful film but great X-Wings. I'll take what I can get.

Are you making some bad joke I don't understand?

I saw the midnight showing and I thought it was fantastic. Definitely an 8.5 / 10 for me. There were definitely things that I did not like at all , but it was so enjoyable overall that I can easily forgive them.

The new characters and the actors portraying them were great - in fact, I thought they stole the scenes from the old, established characters, whenever they appeared together.

I really like T-70's what can I say? The old established characters were just phoning it in, deeply unimpressed with them. Everything to do with the First Order just seemed kind of laughable. The Empire were Space Nazi's, the First Order were comedy Space Neo-Nazi's without any of the menace brought to the screen by Tarkin or Vader they just looked like a bunch of tryhard edgy cosplayers aping an older mans style. Rey,Finn, and Poe could have the potential to be interesting they just didn't get enough chance to grow on me as characters between the nostalgia trips and frenetic action sequences. I have little to no idea what purpose Finn or Poe served by being in the film other than to introduce them as characters who do more stuff in the next movie. Anything more and I'm headed into deep spoiler territory which I'd prefer to avoid for now.

For what its worth I'm really glad that you and many other people enjoyed the movie, and kind of pissed that I didn't. I was hoping that the Star Wars fanboy in me was stronger than this!

Ion Dave, on 17 Dec 2015 - 04:04 AM, said:

I've just got back from midnight opening its bad. Plot jumps all over the place, no sense of pace, some absolutely horrific acting all round. On the bright side T-70's kick absolute ass, they can pinpoint target mansized ground targets from the air and don't even seem to need to use Torpedoes to down larger targets.

Awful, awful film but great X-Wings. I'll take what I can get.

Are you making some bad joke I don't understand?

I saw the midnight showing and I thought it was fantastic. Definitely an 8.5 / 10 for me. There were definitely things that I did not like at all , but it was so enjoyable overall that I can easily forgive them.

The new characters and the actors portraying them were great - in fact, I thought they stole the scenes from the old, established characters, whenever they appeared together.

I really like T-70's what can I say? The old established characters were just phoning it in, deeply unimpressed with them. Everything to do with the First Order just seemed kind of laughable. The Empire were Space Nazi's, the First Order were comedy Space Neo-Nazi's without any of the menace brought to the screen by Tarkin or Vader they just looked like a bunch of tryhard edgy cosplayers aping an older mans style. Rey,Finn, and Poe could have the potential to be interesting they just didn't get enough chance to grow on me as characters between the nostalgia trips and frenetic action sequences. I have little to no idea what purpose Finn or Poe served by being in the film other than to introduce them as characters who do more stuff in the next movie. Anything more and I'm headed into deep spoiler territory which I'd prefer to avoid for now.

For what its worth I'm really glad that you and many other people enjoyed the movie, and kind of pissed that I didn't. I was hoping that the Star Wars fanboy in me was stronger than this!

I think your problem is you think the originals were more than what they were.

Very very simple adventure story set in space with space wizards. And ww2 dogfighting. And a pirate.

The prequels were terrible because they accidentally forgot to have remotely interesting characters and had far too much story and plot.

The new one is a very very simple adventure story set in space with space wizards. And ww2 dogfighting. And a pirate.

It isn't the Godfather. It's a proper Star Wars film. The first since the 80's.

And I can't wait till we get awesome black shuttle.

Yeah try seeing ANH as a rehash of 'hidden fortress' and its somehow makes you realised that there might be some truth in the line 'there are only 13 stories in the world'

Personally i bloody loved the new film, saw it today, going back on saturday to watch it again.

Best star wars movie since ESB for me.