yesterday was the first time i played the game with 4 players and i couldn't find the neutral token for highgarden with the symbol for 4-5 players. I have 2 tokens for highgarden the garrison with 2 and the other one has the three players mark and the " ~ " on both sides.

Can anyone please help me?

There's no token. It's free to take. I guess the idea is that Lannisters are initially weak so they might have a way to back off.